Rest and Cadbury Eggs

Someone told me recently that they thought all of these experiences were probably meant to be growing experiences for me.  And I completely agree with this wise person (Allison!).  I've learned more about myself in the past three months than I was expecting.  In fact, I wasn't really expecting that there would be a personal emotional component to this year long challenge.  Of course, I expected to be motivated and inspired emotionally by the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society and the fact that I can relate every $ raised to my Uncle Pat or another family member or a co-worker or another blood cancer fighter. 

But I didn't think I would be such a mess sometimes!  And most of you know that I pride myself on NOT being a mess.  So, maybe it is a growth experience in that I have to get comfortable in not being comfortable. 

I have wonderful friends, family and co-workers who are constantly telling me that they are proud of me.  And I could not do this without them.  But I recently told a friend of mine that I wish I was more proud of myself.  So sad to be so mean.  So...after all this negativity from myself, I decided it was time for some rest.

Last week, I did nothing.  And it was glorious.  I'm sure that I shouldn't have taken THAT much time off, but I allowed myself what I thought was the 'indulgence' of not running.  And I forced myself to not feel guilty over it.  I ate two Cadbury Eggs.  And a pizza.  And I drank beer.  And ate more pizza.  I read two books.  Again...GLORIOUS.  But a funny thing happened along the rest week...I got antsy.  I wanted to run.  I wanted to sprint. 

This is a special moment in every runner's heart.  When you realize that the running is a part of you and that it is something you want, not something that should be checked off your to-do list.  While the rest week was wonderful, it served its purpose.  I'm ready to rock and roll.  Ready to conquer the 2nd quarter of this year long challenge.  I might be a mess again in a couple of weeks, but I'm going to get comfortable in being uncomfortable and its nothing that some love and a cadbury egg can't fix!